Miles Plumlee finally got some playing time to prove himself, unfortunately he had to go up against Kevin Garnet in a home game, and gets KILLED. Mind me it is just a figure of speech. Kevin Garnet was not only giving it to him in with ball skills but he was also giving it to him verbally, Garnet was basically trash talking the hack out of Plumlee, and it was all about his hair.
Half time comes and Plumlee’s head was hanging lower than a bucket in a well when about to reach the water, which reminds me Plumlee too looked like he was about to produce some water, from the eyes. He was not handling it well his only solution was to try his best to disappear in the corner of the locker room.
David West who knew what was going on walks up and tells him, “Don’t sit there and pout Plumlee, do something about it!”
To Paul George this meant the following; Plumlee needs to do something about his hair. Something he had often fought about mentioning to miles plumlee, but had yet not worked up the courage. He runs back to his locker and grabs his hair gel and hands it to Plumlee. “Use as much as you want.”
Plumlee put a towel over the jar of gel as he is too embarrassed to show what was in his hands as he walks to the bathrooms. He found a mirror, makes his hair wet but then looks at the mirror lost and not knowing what to do.
One of the bathrooms was in use and whoever was in there is stinking and farting it up big time. It got flushed and Lance Stephenson walks out saying, “Now that’s what a real man smells like.” Yes Lance was a confident man because the Pacers’ season had been going great and he is a big part of it.
Lance noticed the jar of gel and he immediately stops in his tracks. He looks at Plumlee’s hair which is wet but still in the same style as always. He said,“Go for a fohawk!” and he walked away.
Plumlee did his best to bring the fohawk look out in his hair. When he was done he stayed in the bathroom hiding till everyone left for the 2e half of the game.
He followed them back to the court at a safe distance, he also made sure not to make any eye contact with any random person walking bye them. That was till Brooke Olzendam addressed him, “Hey Miles?” he looks up in shock and terror afraid of what will happen before Brooke continued, “I like your hair like that.” and she winks. Plumlee’s face lit up, soon after his back was straightened, his shoulders moved outwards and he took the last couple of steps to get back on the court with great confidence.
A different Miles Plumlee came out of the locker room then the one that went in there, needless to say Kevin Garnet got taken by surprise in the 2e half of the game. The crowd was really picking up on it and got louder and louder every time these 2 went at it. Miles started to get an edge over Garnet as his confidence grew and his fortune started to change. A couple of fancy tricks worked out for Miles next George Hill got him the ball for a dunk right over Garnet that got the place into a frenzy. Things got so bad for Garnet that after an up and under move by Plumlee which send Garnet to the woods he had to feign an injury just so he could get out of the game and not be embarrassed any more.
We all knew Plumlee was the hero of the game but better yet he also gave us the win. So after the game who else but Plumlee needed to be interviewed. The camera is rolling already when Plumlee arrived and we were all able to witness how Brooke Olzendam received him with a big hug and in this hug she even lifted one of her feet up to almost touch her own butt with it. You know what I am talking about? Its kinda one of those secret messages that should tell you this hug is for realz. During the interview as well she kept touching his shoulder with her hand and she could not stop giving him an endless amount of compliments about his performance that day.
Well, we were not the only one watching this, so was Tyler Hansbrough, and here is where it got awkward. Tyler had this little crush on her. This crush was only little though cause it had not been brought out into the open, yet. Brooke had not responded well to his little hints and except for Orlando Johnson no one knew anything about it. Yes Orlando and Tyler had quickly become the best of friends. They were a little posse on their own and called themselves the gunslingers. It was kinda appropriate, but let me use their own words to describe it, words they only use in private by the way. Orlando Johnson to Tyler before a game against the Mavericks in Dallas Texas, “This is the wild west, you’d better shoot before someone else does!” They laughed so hard Tyler even snorted and both had tears in their eyes.
This game was early on in the season and it has been their mantra ever since. Mostly they will just say, “Wild west baby.” to not give anything away when others are around. But they know what it means and everyone else can see for themselves that these guys are not messing around on the court. Too bad they don’t have aim to compliment their willingness to sling shots.
But to bring it back in, Tyler was pissed. He told Orlando to hurry up and 10 minutes later they are leaving in Tyler’s Mustang. Orlando looked over to Tyler and noticed the anger in his friend's face, he looked down at Tyler’s hands holding the wheel and noticed that his knuckles had turned white because Tyler was clinching the wheel so hard.
“Fuck!” is what Tyler said as he slammed the wheel, soon followed by, “Sorry did not mean to swear.” Yes he was raised well, there was no swearing around Ma Hansbrough’s house.
Here's a little side note about Tyler hansbrough. It might surprise you here but his business had always been kinda rosy smelling as a mater of fact, its been the weirdest thing. Tyler had even gone to see quite a few doctors about this. Especially after his brothers started making fun of it. Their mom had one spray in the bathroom and it was lavender, but whenever Tyler was done doing his deed it smelled all rosy. The reason why is still a mystery the doctors could not find anything. Tyler’s girlfriend would love it though, that is if he had one.
Anyway, not even Orlando johnson knew about this. What Orlando knew though was that he was a little scared, he had never heard Tyler swear before. But he was still his friend and he wanted to help him, if anything he would like to just help him get his spirit back up.
“You need to change your own image and she’ll notice you, and i bet ya she’ll recognize you are the man Tyler.” The car came to a stop for a red light and Tyler looked over to Orlando. In his facial expression it seemed he was open to this idea so Orlando continued, “I know just the place for this, pick me up at 10 tomorrow morning and I’ll take you there.”
After a 3 hour session at Orlando’s hair dresser Tyler is ready for tonight’s game, it was the 2nd night of a back to back, both at home. His hair was died red and in the vain of Meta World Peace there was this whole pattern cut into his hair that among many other things had the words ‘The new sheriff’ written in it. Tyler was worried but hopeful at the same time. He got to the arena early and decided to post outside the locker room hoping to raise his chances of ‘accidently’ bumping into Brooke.
The other players started arriving and quite a few made comments to Tyler about his new look some were funny and some will remain an attempt at being funny. When Miles Plumlee arrived Tyler pretended to be looking for something in his bag to not have to acknowledge that Plumlee was alive. After the whole team had already gone into the locker room Brooke finally turned around the corner with the camera crew. She gave him the usual quick “hi” but then does a double take and turns around.
“You look amazing Tyler, I love it. Can we film you for a second?” “Sure.” Tyler responded, while keeping his cool but he was besides himself feeling that the new hairdo had worked.
Brooke instructed the crew what angle to capture him in and after the camera had rolled for half a minute she asked Tyler to go through his knees a bit for a couple of times.
Brooke calls cut and just when they are about to go Brooke mentioned to Tyler, “You are standing right in front of the full size Rik Smits poster where he is palming the ball. But where you are standing made it look from this angle like he was palming you by the head. And when you went up and down it almost looked like he was dribbling your head. It was so cute I had to film it, I’ll have the guys edit it and I’ll send you a copy. Have a good game Tyler!”
And she turned around and went on her way without as much as mention or even hint on his new look.
How did Tyler play that day? Like a piece of crap, rosy smelling, but like crap non the less.
Fast forward(No need to rush though.) to 3 weeks later.
Things had gotten worse Tyler had still not gotten over the situation and his game was suffering from it and because of it he was not seeing any playing time. But most of all his anger towards Plumlee was getting worse and worse, to the point where it was effecting the locker room.
Coach Vogel broad it up with assistant Brian Shaw and before he even finished the first sentence Shaw was already nodding his head 'yes'. Though Brian Shaw was a wise and experienced coach he had picked up one funny habit from working next to Phil jackson and that was coming up with random drops of Zen wisdom, but like Phil's they don't always stick to the wall either. After Coach Vogel had stopped himself in mid sentence coach Shaw said the following, "For our team to become one again the players have to dance to a tune that will never be in the top 40. But this song is the best song in the entire world, but only if you play it on a record player." Vogel always saw himself as a deep thinker but when it came down to Brian Shaw's drops of wisdom all he could do was scratch his head and say "Aha" to try and move the conversation rapidly onwards. "Let's go see the players in the locker room before they come out to practice."
In the locker room Coach Vogel got everyone's attention but had to wait till Lance Stephenson was ready to come out of the the bathroom stall. Lance entered with a smile as broad as his face, never had there been a man more proud of his ... let's call it number 2. Which reminds me why did he wear the #1 on his shirt when in fact he took more pride in his #2's.
But where were we? Oh yes, coach Vogel. "Get that smile of you face and sit down." Lance was quick to respond, "Why should I not smile, I almost wrote my whole name in there. That's something to be proud of."
Coach Vogel shook his head and waited for Lance to take his seat. "Ok guys there has been some tension in the locker and ..." But again it was not for Coach Vogel to finish his own sentence, this time it was Danny Granger who was interrupting him by already standing up and pacing through the room. In his mind, Danny thought he looked like a general leading his men in a tough battle. To the innocent bystander he looked more like a schoolteacher on his first day. Strict, fierce, intimidating, direct, convincing and jovial all at the same time, yet with this undercurrent of insecurity and thus losing the battle none the less, cause kids look right through that and take advantage quicker than they can send a text message. Luckily for Granger he is teaching evening classes for adults and he can get away with that stuff.
Danny looked over at his Coach and said, "Coach Vogel we got this." Next he looked around the locker room at his team mates and said, "Tonight at my house 7 o'clock no exceptions, tell your girl we are working overtime. It's not easy being an NBA player and lots of sacrifices have to be made. But don't worry I predict good things will come out of this."
Not everyone was sure about this and Lance Stephenson's expression on his face looked like he just bit into a fat slice of lemon. Quite a few players looked over at David West to see how he felt about this. D. West was not one to leave people guessing and thus spoke out, "I'll be there 10 to 7."
Shaw told everyone to get ready for practice and the tension seemed to have lifted already.
But after practice quite a few players came up to Granger wanting to check in about tonight's meeting but Granger was consistent and short in his answers. "I'll see you at 7 o'clock at my house no need to bring anything." With experience a teacher learns that feedback can be more useful then being right.
Anyway Granger was a man who took pride in his ability to prepare and right now the task at hand was tonight's meeting at his house. A shopping list and a to do list were already being formulated in his head while he quickly got dressed to run out and get things done.
As soon as Granger left the locker room Lance raised his voice, "Well, I guess I'll be taking my girl out to Granger's house for some diner? Cause my girl does not like to be turned down."
All the players with kids started talking because all the ladies had a girls night planned. Something Danny's wife would have been part of if not for the fact she was out of town visiting family leaving Danny unaware of the challenges he brought about. The parent players were scrambling to find a babysitter, not an easy thing to do in less then 2 hours. The other players were working their magic in gracefully canceling a date on short notice. Neither were easy. D. West definitely regretted his agreement to tonight's meeting but he had not thought it through before hand and he was not the kind of man to back away from his word.
The locker room turned into soccer mom central with everyone hitting the phones to create the best solution from an impossible situation.
But none the less 10 to 7 David West rang Granger's doorbell. Danny swung the door wide open, "What up D. West? ... awkward silence as Granger looked behind David's back. David West had to explain himself, "I hope it's o.k. I had to bring the kids, because I had no luck finding a babysitter for the kids, with the wife being out with all the other player's wives. They are really well behaved it should not be a problem" Well, I don't think any body in the world was worried about David West's kids misbehaving, but he felt the need to explain anyway.
Well it turned out everybody was bringing somebody along to the players meeting only. There was Miles Plumlee who had his grandma visiting who was a real social gall but bad of hearing so she was real loud. There was George Hill with his family because it was Hill's younger brother's birthday, so the family came along cause they had plans for later and George thought it was not going to take long. There was Paul George with his hairdresser and his ever so attractive daughter. Does Paul have a crush on her? He's got the moves but does not choose to go for it instead he settles for the long shot.
Too bad for Granger non of the other fathers found any babysitters and non of the wives were willing to give up their only night of, so all of them showed up with their little critters. Like I said D. West had some well behaved kids well so did DJ Augustin, but the problem was his parenting style was different. See DJ was raised very strict and he had vowed to never be like that so he made sure his kids knew that it was ok for them to be heard and seen. Like I said they behaved very well according to the parents, but it does not always look that way to other people, especially people with Danny's kind of personality.
Granger was not at ease, his house hold was the kind where a coaster was under your drink whether you thought of it or not. In Granger's house there was no such thing as random things that were still laying around. There were no glasses of water that were left there the day before, any day. Granger liked his house clean, so he made sure he had cleaners come bye twice a week. But these cleaners would joke to each other saying stuff like this, "I think I actually saw a speck of dust today. I decided not to clean it though." And yes for all you rich people out there; the working class are all, "Yes sire, no sire." when you are around, but as soon as you turn your back on them they laugh and joke about all the odd things you do with your money, FYI. But I understand that's why you are happy you are rich, you can afford to be weird and not have to change or adjust for anyone. Wow, Dr. Phil just come through?
The last to arrive actually was Lance Stephenson and he was the only one who showed up by himself, and the first thing he said was, "What are you guys thinking this is a player's meeting do you guys have no respect for the host?" Yep, he did it again he found the sore spot and pushed it. The only one to agree with his statement was the host, but at this point he was in too deep already so he kept his mouth shut.
Augustin's four year old boy walked up to Lance and said, "Who are you?" A question that has been known to throw most adults off, but we are talking Lance Stephenson here who simply replied with a stern voice, "I am a teacher and I am going to teach you a lesson." This four year old knew enough about teachers and their reputation that he knew that there was reason to be concerned, his 4 year old body immediately knew to retreat all blood from the skin. Lance witnessed the pail skin on the young boys face and started laughing while saying, "No, not that kind of lesson. This one is fun come with me."
Ten seconds later all the lights were turned of at once and the little boys voice was heard saying, "I wanna see Paul George do his dunk again." while in the background the roaring laughter of Lance could be heard besides himself with joy.
It was at this moment that the Mahinmi kids were getting themsleves some drinks, French as they are they helped themselves to some wine and just added some water to dilute the fermented grape-juice according to their age. The augustine kids soon followed and even the D.West youngsters followed suite they just made sure they sat right back down as well behaved kids do. Ten minutes later drinking songs could be heard from deep down their throats. They started off with the kids song, "The snake baked a hoe cake." soon followed by an other classic, "Mary wore a red dress." Though I am sure they did not intend to do so but the swaying of the glasses did create some spillage and it being red wine resulted in stains.
At this point things were out of control already and still no one was sure how it came about, it almost seemed like the invite had gotten on Facebook because of all the random people that showed up.
Brooke Olzendam was there, but only for a couple of minutes because Austin Croshere walked in and said her cell phone was ringing. Mark jackson was there and he was downloading all kinds of good information to George Hill about being a floor leader. Jalen Rose showed up lecturing some of the younger players on how to be Fab, not discriminating if you were fab by yourself self or with with 4. Rik Smits was hanging out in the kitchen for a while making people some tasty food and certainly not forgetting to feed himself, but he soon disappeared again without saying goodbye unless you consider him firing up his 250 cc dirt-bike as his way of saying farewell. Most of the cheerleaders were there and D. West asked them to babysit all the kids. And in case you were not a parent let us quickly sign up for a parenting class. Cheering kids on and not guiding them can quickly escalate things.
Pretty much all the members of area 55 were there, though Hibbert to this day denies he invited them, i guess somehow they got word. They are a loud bunch, but well behaved none the less. At one point one of the cheerleaders knocked a glass over chasing one of the kids around the table and Hibbert caught it, you should have heard the area 55 folks cheer their hero on.
Plumlee's grandma had a thing for Paul George she had always had a thing for tall lanky man. She kept calling him a negro though which was kinda weird, but with older lady's like her you gotta realize they never received the memo. She was really nice though and Paul George was not thrown of by her poor quality in vocabulary. He even let her wear his Baseball cap and his sneakers. But after seeing herself in the mirror she was all excited to dance like "Negros do" and asked George to put on some music. Paul George tried to explain to her, these days we say "I am colored or African American." "Oh really, that's so cute," was her responds, "in my days they called it "negros" so I'll just keep calling you like that. She looked George deep in the eyes as she said this and she had this endearing smile on her face as well. This was her way of letting him know that she really meant no harm and also that she was not ready to change.
As the song came on she reached over for the the volume button and cranked it way up and started busting out moves she had seen younger kids make on tv. Folks were quickly drawn in and started cheering her on. It even looked like faint disco lights were turned on. The cheerleaders who had shown up in their gear decided to back her up with their own moves. There were others who started to loosen their hips and slowly getting into it.
Till the doorbell rang ... everyone woke up out of the high and looked around to actually asses the situation they were in. Those "disco light" were actually coming from the outside and the were most likely police lights. "OH SHIT!"
Paul George hit the mute button and everything got quiet, except for everyone's heart beating down in their throats.
"Everybody on the ground, I'll take care of this!" Lance Stephenson said. Everyone wanted to scream no but no one was able to think of a better plan. The truth be told the majority of folks present were too preoccupied with saving their butts, they decided that to hit the floor was the best option in hope of discovering a magic door from which they could escape.
Lance on the other was not of that mindset, he picked up some headphones and the 4 year old Augustin boy before killing all the lights again. He opened the front door and faced the two officers without any hesitation. "Gentlemen, I do apologize for disturbing the peace I was doing bedtime with my little one and he likes to listen to loud music when he goes to sleep, but we could not find the headphones." The officers needed a moment to recover before they responded. "This is Danny Granger's house though is it not?" Lance responded, "Yes Gentlemen you are right, I am Lance Stephenson and I am house sitting while they are visiting Danny's brother who is having a baby. My house is getting painted on the inside and I don't wanna expose the little trooper to those nasty fumes. But we had forgotten to bring the headphones in the process." The police thought they had found a crack in his story and immediately addressed it, "But mister Stephenson aren't those headphones in your hands?" Lance smiled at them and said, "Yes we just found them, so we won't be any more trouble."
It is hard to say if this was planned or just a divine gift, but the four year old in Lance's arms opened his mouth wide for a loud and drawn out yawn. Lance put it to good use. "I know little trooper it's way past your bedtime." And addressing the police again he said, "If you will excuse us we are about to count some sheep." and he proceeded to close the door.
No one moved, neither all the people on the floor nor the 2 policeman outside of the door. You could hear they were talking but through the closed door you could not hear what they were saying, but it was apparent they seemed to be having a hard time making up their minds.
The floor was covered with bodies and there was not enough room for everybody so people had to make due with the little amount of space that was available. Which meant people were forced to touch each other and sometimes even partially laying on top of each other. America might be a great country, but its people are not always that comfortable with physical contact, especially not when it is with people we only half know. As the minutes were passing bye ever so slowly the self consciousness was slowly creeping back in as well. No one was ready to get up yet, but some were ready to at least adjust there uncomfortable bodies a little bit. Some took the opportunity within this adjusting that was going on to look around and see who it was they were actually pushed up against or covered bye. For some it turned out to be a pleasant surprise; Paul George found out to his great joy that the hairdresser's daughter was the one who was clamped onto his right upper arm holding on for dear life. And for quite a few others there were pleasant surprises strewn around the room; imagine playing twister with a bunch of cheerleaders and just when you are all tied up the person who was spinning has to go for a bathroom brake. Not bad right?
But not all was comfortable for everyone. In the fall to the ground Tyler had fallen down with someone and in the process they had clasped hands. From fear both had held on to the others hand but Tyler could no longer hold his curiosity and looked over to whom these little soft hands belonged to. This "hotty" in Tyler's mind turned out to be Miles Plumlee, "Noooooo."is what crossed Tyler's mind. The only saving grace in this situation was that Plumlee was not looking in his direction. Tyler's instinct was to pull his arm away but there was absolutely not enough room to maneuver. If he had decided to let go of holding hands they'd still be touching because of the lack of space, that would be even weirder. Tyler decided to turn his head back and decide to feign innocence.
But all jokes aside a lot was at stake here if these policeman decided to ring the door bell again and force the issue a bit things would not be looking good for anyone in this room. Danny Granger had it by far the hardest, he could already read the headlines, "Pacers' wild party at Danny Granger's house." He would never be able to overcome this, not after all that the Pacers had gone through in the last decade. Thoughts were spinning through his head fast, "What will Larry Bird do to me if he hears about this one?" or, "What is the best excuse I can come up with to my wife?"
But than sounds were heard outside the door like someone was moving and everyone stopped thinking about anything. All the attention span of the 40 or so people in the room was directed on what the sounds were that the policemen were making out there. Was it happening, was it true were they leaving? Were those the footsteps of 2 policemen exiting the premiss?
I swear they took 5 minutes but it seemed like they were taking 5 hours to decide which side the ax was to fall, but now it was happening they were in fact leaving.
Lot's of sighs of relief were heard, but someone was not ready to let them of the hook that easy.
Lance turned the lights back on and addressed everyone, "I have two words for you, "Larry Bird". Do I need to say more? I don't think so, we all know what he has done for us and this organization. We should all forget about our personal differences ..." He looked over at Tyler and Miles here and noticed they were holding hands. "Well I can see that Tyler and Miles have put their differences aside." Everyone looked over to see for themselves and most of the cheerleaders went, "Aaaaawww."
It was silent for a moment, neither Tyler or Miles could at first think of a good way to get out of this situation, but than Tyler thought of the solution. He reached over and gave Miles a big hug while still laying down and than let go of Miles all together.
This was the cue for Lance to pick up where he had left, "This is the Pacers, and we bring the best team effort in the NBA! Take this message with you and bring it to every game we play and to every practice we do. Now for the logistics, it's time we start cleaning up and bring this place back in order. Also while we are cleaning we need to slowly start going home, dads with kids first one family at a time."
Everyone got up and went to the closest task at hand transforming the place back to the way it was. After everyone had left it was just Danny and Lance left. Danny turned to Lance and said, "I don't think I'd expected to ever say this, but I will now, "Lance, you saved my ass, if you had not taking care of that situation we would have been in some serious trouble. Thank you!" Danny opened his arms and put Lance in their for a big hug. Before Lance was able to respond Danny continued, "I have a question. Do you know my brother is gay?" Lance got a smile on his face, "I know, I am down with that. I just like to mess with people and if these policemen knew about that and had brought it up there'd be a good chance they'd be uncomfortable having a conversation about it. My Hope was they'd stay away from having that conversation all together."
Scotty, Danny's brother was a singer songwriter with a really nice voice. Danny on the other hand thought he had a nice voice also but no one in the locker room agreed with him on this. This is how Danny got to be called Hollywood
It has been a running joke that Danny is Hollywood because he thinks he has a nice voice and flaunts it whenever possible but no one else feels the way he does about his voice.
Lance had to say one more thing before he left"Your brother has got a nice voice by the way, sorry it does not run in the family. Haha" and he starts running for the door.